Not exactly the Mount of Transfiguration inside of a 2000 Accord but I conversed with the living God
while gliding along Hwy 31 on the way to a Chamber of Commerce breakfast meeting. I felt inclined to knock on God's door on behalf of a friend who reported feeling under a load of pressure.
My conversation with God went something like this...
"If Byron says he's feeling pressure, then he's feeling PRESSURE. Lord, I don't know what to ask you to do. I don't know what kind of pressure he's facing and feeling."
"Ramon, when you feel pressure, besides just stress what else are you feeling when the heat's on?"
"Hmmm.... I feel afraid."
" Afraid of what? Think about it."
" Different things. I'm afraid of failing, afraid of not having enough..."
"Enough of what?"
"Enough time, enough money, enough support, enough help, enough interest, enough attendance, enough cooperation, enough energy, enough ability. Afraid of not having enough of something to get the job done right or done at all, not enough to make ends meet. Sometimes I feel like the plate spinning guy in the circus. High speed, off-balance multi-tasking. I don't know that I can keep all my 57 personal and professional plates spinning? Sometimes I afraid that...
"What was that crashing sound ?"
" Make that 56 plates."
"So, you're afraid of not having what you need, or at least afraid of not having what you think you need?"
"Yea, I'm afraid of not having enough of what I need so I can produce."
"Interesting. Produce what?"
" Results. And no, it's not about producing results so I look good, if that's what You're thinking. I'm not an approval or applause addict. Results is about...everything coming out right. God, I'm afraid of coming up short, not measuring up, OK? I said it already, I'm afraid of failing. I'm afraid of being mediocre. I'm afraid of not being able to keep up. I'm a good counselor and a good writer but what if that's not enough to take care of my family? I have to be a good businessman now too. A really good business owner. When it comes right down to it...for me, what it all boils down to is..I'm afraid of failing as a provider for my family. I'm afraid that my wife has put her trust in me and I'm going to let her down. God, I'm afraid of making her afraid. Does any of that makes sense?
"It does. Anything else that you're afraid of?"
"The unknown."
"The unknown?"
"Yea, I fear the unknown, the uncertainty. I'm afraid of what could happen or afraid of what won't happen that needs to happen."
"Ramon, remember what David said about where he went and where I showed up, that there is no place in time, location, or experience that I'm not already there with the coffee made when you first arrive. Ramon, if you knew, really knew that I was going to be fully present and engaged in the mysterious unknown and uncertainty of your future, what else would you need to know?"
"Huh?"
"If you knew that I promised to BE with you wherever, whenever, for whatever...and if you knew I would keep My promise, of what thing would you need to be afraid?"
"Nothing?"
"Yea, nothing."
"I think I get it. But you know you'll need to remind me of this conversation from time to time. Short memory.
"Glad to. Anything else on your mind?"
"Well, God, I was going to pray for Byron."
"You just did."
"I was talking about me, my pressures, my fears. I didn't get around to asking you to do anything for Byron."
"Do you think the source and core of your pressures and your fears are that much different than his?"
"Maybe not, but I still didn't ask you to do anything for him."
"I'm running a 2-for-1 special today."
"Cool. Thanks. Anything else you want to tell me before I go inside to this breakfast thing."
"Yea, just tell Byron about our conversation this morning. Tell him I'm thinking about him."
"Anything else?"
" They're going to ask you to do the invocation & blessing prayer before the meal. Just talk to me and don't try to impress the crowd with your prayer. Deal?
"Deal."